Thornton's Guerilla_Blog

Rapture of Being Alive . . .

2007-10-01T23:33:00.001-07:00

Yes.

Music and Life. . .

2007-09-05T17:28:00.001-07:00

Of music, goals, gurus, life coaches and dance . . . . . a video from a man who used words far better then I ever could. On the list of people I have admired and learned from, place the late, great Alan Watts right at the top.

"Civilized people, whether Western or Eastern need to liberated and de-hypnotized from their systems of symbolism . . . . the so called physical world, and the so called human body are a single process. Differentiated only as the heart from the lungs, or the head from the feet."
- Alan Watts

You can't be a true atheist if you have not read Alan Watts.

"Each entered the forest that he had chosen where there was no path and where it was darkest"

The miracle . . .

2007-09-03T02:30:00.000-07:00

The miracle of love

comes to us

in the presence of the uninterpreted moment.

To live content with small means; to seek elegance rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion; to be worthy , not respectable, and wealthy, not rich; to study hard, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly; to listen to stars and birds, to babes and sages, with open heart; to bear all cheerfully, do all bravely, await occasions, hurry never.

In a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the common.

This is to be my symphony.

- William Henry Channing

Follow your Bliss.

Notes on risk. . .

2007-05-21T22:49:00.000-07:00

The courage to Love is the courage to affirm against tradition whatever knowledge stands confirmed in ones own experience.

And that love is always perfect confidence.

A note from the late great Joseph Campbell:

There’s one quotation I ran into in La Queste del Saint Graal which hit me as being the essence of what I’d call the European or Western spirituality. The knights of King Arthur’s court were seated at table and Arthur would not let the meal be served until an adventure had occurred. And, indeed, an adventure did occur. The Grail itself appeared, carried by angelic miracle, covered, however, by a cloth. Everyone was in rapture and then it withdrew. Arthur’s nephew Gawain stood up and said, "I propose a vow. I propose that we should all go in pursuit of this Grail to behold it unveiled." And it was determined that that was what they would do. And then occur these lines which seem to me so wonderful:

"They thought it would be a disgrace to go forth in a group. Each entered the forest that he had chosen where there was no path and where it was darkest."
- La Queste del Saint Graal

I am headed overseas until June. . . . .carve your own path. It's always ready for you, provided your prepared to ignore everyone else who claims to know what you should be doing instead.

Most people are not prepared for that, not by upbringing, not by religion, not by school, and not by birth. They never will listen to their own inside voice, in exclusion to the authorities. It becomes not a life less ordinary, an adventure, joyful, unique and built solely for you. Rather, it's played safe, and instead it is nothing but the wasteland. Their is a better way, and it doesn't involve teachers, gurus, clergy, psychologists, new agers, or 'life coaches'. It involves just you, your heart, your soul, and a little silence.

"Each entered the forest that he had chosen where there was no path and where it was darkest"

Namaste.

Walking needles. . .

2007-01-03T12:59:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine here in Portland told me this today.

“If you look at the wisest people, you will find that most of them live alone.

It’s not because they are playing the field, chasing skirts, or anything like that. That would be equally painful. . . . It’s because they look outside at all this we see (waves arms around) and they realize that’s not it.

Sure it’s all attractive, the beautiful woman, cars, possessions, money . . . but they have realized that all of it is temporary. And all of it brings suffering.

They have learned through experience that they have to look within, that the happiness is inside, not outside, reached through self inquiry."

He continued. . .

"You know, you really can’t tell anything from the cover, from a persons looks, from the wrapping outside. We all claim to know that, but I am always still learning it.

Take her for example. . .(referring to a very pretty young woman we both just saw). . she is beautiful no doubt. Thin, nice breasts, pretty eyes, sexy haircut, cool clothes, all that stuff. . .but inside, inside she’s terrible. . . . .”She’s angry?” I asked. . . . yes, she’s just awful. See you just can’t tell from the outside. . . .”she’s angry then” I repeated. . . .part of it’s hormonal, sure.

But no, she’s just viscous inside. See you just can’t ever tell."

He continued. . .

"See there are primarily two types of people in this world. Think of them as giant walking needles.
One type comes at you, pushes in the needle, and sucks all the life and energy from you that it can.

The second type comes at you, inserts the needle, and injects this poison drug inside you. . . . .walking needles".

He continued. . .

"I was out on New Years eve, and I decided to take a walk down the waterfront. And it was a beautiful evening, and as long as I was down there on the waterfront it was really nice.

But, just one block away, one block up, by the Dixie Lounge and Chinatown. . .just one block up, it was hell. . . . . “drunks everywhere” I said. . . .Yes, woman drunk, all pushed up, sucked in, decked out. . . men drunk, blind, stupid, all of them looking so incredibly hungry.

It is a hell. . . .hell for sure.

Those are those needles I am talking about."

He continued. . .

"But there is another type of person. They are very rare, extremely rare. It’s someone who brings you pure joy. It’s very rare, and it’s such a blessing when you find them.

When you see the man with a woman like that, so joyful, you know he’s found that. . . . . .Somehow, she just knows how to nourish the joy in you. . . . . . .It’s amazing to see the change.”

“Don’t forget that. . . . .remember that”,

he said as I left.

You is. . . .

2006-11-27T02:47:00.000-08:00

. . . time.

You IS Time

Fortunate Son. . . . .

2006-08-01T07:30:00.000-07:00

“Whether the Universe is a concourse of atoms, or nature is a system, let this first be established, that I am part of the whole which is governed by nature; next, I am in a manner intimately related to the parts which are of the same kind with myself.”
- Marcus Aurelius

This also is vanity
- Ecclesiastes

It’s been awhile since I have updated this BLOG. . . . .it’s been about family, friends, and the Portland Summer, with the colors of Fall giving way to 90 degree weather, and a cool breeze.

There has been loss of friends and loved ones. Reminders to remain Authentic in relationships, and grateful for knowing those that meet along the way.

We can’t be free in any fashion if we hold the hand of fear. But we can always be thankful.

I spent one of the best Months of my life in Iceland.
I had my back tattooed.
And I jumped out of an airplane at 10,000 feet.

I went to Canada, then Singapore, an amazing zone on the map of Asia. This was followed by Nevada, and then the UK and Scotland, where I am currently.

Words of advise, count your shots when in restaurants, and count your blessings when you melt into rhythm while standing in a natural hot springs and experiencing the sensation of cold hail hitting your shoulders

I don’t have anything to express regarding all this except thank you, to those I’ve met, and those at home. I am fortunate.

“Loss is nothing else then change. But the universal nature delights in change. . .and will. . .to time without end.”
-Marcus Aurelius

We are all one.

I could go on about the land of ice and snow. Or my beautiful friend who shares a drink and smile with me when I come back to PDX. Or the Indian man that sat next to me on the way to Canada and began explaining how nice it was when you meets you. Or the question of the Month about “Why is he smiling when she is standing on him” . But at this moment that ain’t happening.

Instead I will just say that the only real demon/daemons I can actually locate, the one we all face in our own perfect time (myself included always), seems to be fear (which is a story / thought). And it has so many faces. . . .and it’s better then okay. Absence of fear, even if for a moment, is the joy that can’t be faked. And right action at right time is found there. In that there is no trying, no potential, no loss, no gain, no effort, and no rules. If someone is trying to sell that to you, don’t buy. It’s always free, and always you.

Don’t be afraid. And if you are, don’t worry. You will get home one way or the other.

“Either the gods have no power. If, then, they have no power, why do you pray to them? But if they have power, why do you not pray for them to you give you the faculty of not fearing any of the things which you fear, or of not desiring any of the things which you desire, or not being pained at anything, rather then pray that any of these things should not happen, or happen?. . . .. Not to pray: How shall I not lose this. . . but to pray: How shall I not be afraid to lose this? Pray this way, and see what comes.”
-Marcus Aurelius

My perspective at this moment is as follows. . . .hold those you love, and let them know how you feel. We never know how long they will be here for that. Listen carefully, something fantastic is reaching out to you in all those moments. And it’s only found when you stop trying.

“Let us be honest, let us have the courage and candor to say: “We do not know”. If by any possibility the existence of a power superior to, and independent of, nature shall be demonstrated, there will be time enough to kneel. Until then, let us stand erect.”
- Robert Ingersoll

Nobody in hospice ever wished they worked more. But they do want to know about this planet we share, and the regret of not traveling enough is topped only by the desire for more authentic and open connection in human relationships. More love and openess, more time with those they cared for all Years. Those are the only regrets.

The rest is profit for greedy old men, and the worship of Mammon.

There is no value in that.
Even if you win the rat race,
your still a rat . . . .

Serve something more meaningful. . . . . .and when that genuine smile pops up, the one that arises without effort and despite your opinion. . . .in that authentic space, just to the left, that’s where I’ll meet you. It’s the autonomous free zone. . .our real home.

After all. . . . .all spiritual practices are illusions, designed by illusionists, to escape illusion. And the illusion is that you are not already free.

With
inner freedom
from the snare
of image induced
illusion, delusion
and obsession,
two or more
can merge
and flow
into
the Eternal Sea
of
Love’s
Infinity,
with
myriad millions
expressing
Love and Life
in ceaseless
and joyously
changing
expressions
of
rhythm
color
and tone.

Ultimately they shall find for themselves that there is in reality only one “I”, which appears as innumerable egos, which are in fact all as temporary as passing shadows.

Parvati is calling me, I gotta go.

***

My work. . . .

2006-04-08T23:30:00.000-07:00

"Spiritual practice can never be fulfilled by imitation of an outer form of perfection."
- st John of the cross

I am going to Iceland in a day or so. I wanted to post something before I went that honestly reflected what I see in my best moments. In my worst moments this is all forgotten. Which is why I think they are my worst moments, at the time.

How do we love ourselves? = By not seeking approval outside ourselves.

It is only then that we are able to realize that we already have it.

Polite behavior is full of approval seeking disguised as consideration. When you say or do anything to please, get, influence, or control anyone or anything, FEAR is the CAUSE. . . .and PAIN is the result.

Manipulation is separation.

Separation is painful.

If you act from fear, there is no way you can receive love, because you are trapped in a thought about what you have to do for it.

"Our greatest blessings come to us by way of madness provided the madness is given to us by divine gift." -Socrates

For the personality, love is nothing more then an agreement. If I agree with you, you love me. And the minute I don't agree with you, the minute I question one of your sacred beliefs, I become your enemy.

Then you start looking for all the reasons why you are right. . . .this causes you to stay focused outside yourself. . .that is a form of self medication . .when you stay focused outside yourself and you believe your problem is caused by someone else, rather then by your attachment to the story. . . .you are your own victim.

we chase the bigger house, nicer car, larger bank account, better performance, and "positive" image. . . .until we again become frustrated with the limitations of the new form. All form is limited. And in that frustration we seek more, and more, and more. . .until we realize it is never the 'right' form. It can never bring real happiness, real peace.

Until I realize what it is beyond all form, through all form, and surrender to that.

My understanding of a person is always limited by what I think I already know. And it is true to say that I no longer believe anyone can 'change' their mind. I think you can question the mind. . .and if the questioning is sincere, then that can change the experience of thoughts.

Can I always remember the clear distinction between those two above ideas? One is authentic, and one is just an effort to manipulate. One sweeps the patterns under the table. The other cleanses them with light.

The fake smile is easy to spot, it is deliberate, and designed to extract some sort of reaction or perception from and in you. It is designed to manipulate for gain.

"You see the fact that your spiritual journey is an entirely different ball game from the path you thought you where on. It is very difficult to make that transition."
- Ram Dass

Now think of the real smile. It cannot be faked. How does it feel when it occurs? Can you always remember the difference?

Here is what I think. . . .we fear that we wont be able to tell the difference, and that fear brings about a defense which 'wants'.

The 'want' is a fear, two sides of the same coin. And the fear creates a desire. Which is almost rudundent in that desire is fear.

If the desire is strong enough. . .which is to say the fear present enough, then we will forget to notice the difference between the fake, and the geniune smile. We are too busy in those moments being distracted, and so we don't get to really feel that geniune human connection.

Long story short what fools us about peoples true motives is the fear that we are going to be fooled. Without that fear we see everything. Without desire we cannot possibly be fooled.

Think about it, without any expectation of a non existent future all there is to experience is the truth of the present moment.

There are no new thoughts. There is nothing new under the sun. It's all a reflection. . . with every moment being exactly every-thing. But only all the time.

When Jesus said, "I am the vine and you are the branches" he could have also stated "You are the Vine AND the Branches."

After all, is he talking about ONE plant or TWO there?

Manipulation is separation.

It is about Natural Being versus Trying. . . .

you cannot try to be humble. .
you either are, or are not in the moment
you cannot try to be sincere. .
you either are, or are not in the moment
you cannot try to be genuine. .
you either are, or are not in the moment
you cannot try to be giving. .
you either are, or are not in the moment
you cannot try to be authentic. .
you either are, or are not in the moment
you cannot try and be ecstatic. .
you either are, or are not in the moment
You cannot try to be good. .

it just IS.

"If you begin to understand what you are without trying to change it, then what you are undergoes a transformation."
- J. Krishnamurti

People who aren't interested in seeing how everything is good, get to be right. But that apparent rightness comes with disgruntlement, depression, and separation.

What I need is what I have. This is not something to believe; rather, it is the way things are right now, whether you believe it or not.

"Events happen, deeds are done, but there is no individual doer thereof" - The Buddha

Freedom is awareness not moved by fear or desire.

Freedom is Love.

Who knew?

*(Warning: Any expression of Matt's personality is a direct indication of a desire for something, and therefore occurs out of need. But only ever yours. Matt's personality has been shown to be harmful in large doses, so please stick with doctor recommended dosage. Though Matt's personality is sometimes absent, this is not an indication of an enlightened state, but rather may simply be a sign of fatigue. In the event of sudden realization matt's personality may become absent, in which case the makers of Matt's personality assume no responsibility for any harm this product may cause.)

Even if it was only for the Nerfman you gave me, my Love for you could never pass away.

+++ +++ +++

Either - Or & Other. . . .

2006-03-20T23:49:00.000-08:00

I have always been on the side of the heretics and against those who burned them, because the heretics so often turned out to be right. . Dead, but right.
-Edward R. Murrow.

I returned a few weeks ago from a great trip to Ireland. I left the next weekend for Berkeley CA, and have been more or less on the move since. So it has been a busy six weeks.

On this last trip to Ireland I took long time Portland Instructor and friend Travis Davison. We started the journey in Dublin, at John Kavanaghs Gym. While we were at Johns I was able to watch a very interesting documentary called "The God who wasnt there". You can see info regarding this movie here:

http://www.thegodmovie.com/pagan/

Its an interesting movie that points to the mythological, rather then historic, origins of the Christian Religion. And although none of that was new for me, it did strike me as obvious that if there was a time when people needed to watch something like this, it was now. Especially in this Country.

The part of the film that really hit me wasn't the mythological aspects of the Christian religion. Those are really easy shots to launch. What struck me was the visit the narrator of the film takes back to his fundamentalist Christian school of childhood.

Having questioned and overcome his fundamentalist roots, he asks for an interview with the current principle. Who happened to be the same administrator who was there when he was a child.

The question he asked was simply this:

"Do you think its ethical to teach children this mythology, under the guise of being factual?

Do you think its a healthy, and moral thing to do to teach children nonsense, like the idea that they will burn in eternal hellfire if they don't believe as you do?"

The principle was clearly taken back by the line of questioning. And that is what really caught my senses the most. . .he was not used to being asked questions like this. And that is because we as a society don't ask these questions of these types of people.

And the thing is this. . .they are damn good questions.

Consider this. . .should someone who believes that the Earth is actually 6000 Years old, that Adam and Eve were real people who really did eat from a piece of fruit after having a conversation with a talking snake, and that at somepoint their anthropomorphic Father God (always male) will come back to Earth to save them . . . . should someone who believes that be allowed access to nuclear weapons?

Perhaps the answer is yes . . . if they have shown themselves to be rational the rest of the time. But shouldn't we as a society at least be asking these kind of questions?

And furthermore, have you heard these types of questions asked recently?

We have handed the keys to the asylum over to the inmates without ever asking these basic questions, and then we wonder why things seem so backwards so much of the time.

We had the privilege of spending a longer period of time in Northern Ireland on this last trip. In the past I had only visit for a day or two at a time. I wanted to learn as much as a could from the people who lived there about what this old conflict was really all about. What is really going on with the whole Catholic - Protestant strife.

There is a lot of History to the whole issue. And I would encourage anyone really interested to do research. The history of the Irish struggle for Independence, the repression by the British, the Ulster Irish (many who migrated to the USA), the Loyalists, the whole thing is a very interesting piece of the human story.

But barring that, here is my readers digest version which has been reduced to my own subjective vision at the time. In short, these are just my own opinions, and can barely represent a small fraction of how complicated the whole system can be.

It comes down to the Age old evil of the "Other". The cornerstone lie which states that those "people" over there, aint you.

And I will say this, Religion (in this case Christianity) has as usual been absolutely no help in this regard. But I don't really think it is the major problem either.

The problem is attachment to a simplistic model of "who" we are. This seems to exist in its strongest form when juxtaposed against "an-other" that is not you. And if this image is threatened in anyway it always tends to turn violent.

This is a necessity because, like all forms of fundamentalism, it cannot be backed by rational thought.

And we will call this above stated problem, 'Loyalists'.

For their side it really doesn't seem to run any deeper then "We are - (insert nation/race here) - and we will stay that way!" The simple minded evil of Nationalism.

On the Catholic side it is a bit more complicated. *(note: sarcasm. ..its actually really frickin complicated). The history of the Irish Catholics under prodestent British rule is filled with an incredible amount of injustice, bigotry, and repression. It seems like the British operated more or less a plantation system. With the oldboy network receiving the land, thanks to the Queens good grace, and then farming it out to the Irish Catholics who were kept in a constant state of second class citizenship.

In short the Irish Catholics had a damn good reason to want freedom from the British. They had a cause.

Take a good look at some of the murals.

I have to admit that while I try and stay as objective as possible when I travel to places like this, you can't help but see the obvious difference between the artwork of the Loyalists factions, and that of the Irish Catholic areas.

Notice that the Loyalists Art always seems to have a gun pointed in your face, and the overall craft of the work itself is pretty poor. Then look at the artistry and images of the Catholic Art.

That is the difference between a genuine cause . . . . and the cause of "We aint them, we are better".

I would also like to say that we had a fantastic time in Northern Ireland. Everyone we met was hospitable, friendly, and good spirited. It is a great place, and much of the tension seems to be slowly going away, even if the murals remain.

It looks like a whole lot of that stress started to pass about the same time Thatcher left office.

What a coincidence.

I also dont think we have any room to speak when it comes to the issue of ignorant fundamentalists. After all, many of them our running the government of this Nation now.

I think it is fairly obvious that ALL conservatism is based on fear, always. And fundamentalists in all forms, are extreme versions of this phenomenon.

In the context of an Administration that out sources people to other Countries so they can tortured, such as Uzbekistan where they like to boil people alive, has just been caught wire tapping its own people, and too many other things to write at the moment. . . .what can you really say? These people not only belong out of public office, they belong behind bars.

It will take decades to sort out all the damage these War profiteers have done to our Nation. Sadly, their right wing familiars will distract their own voter base with meaningless issues, and superficial ploys to elicit emotional reactions, such as the "war on Christmas" and other such nonsense, and so it goes. And people consistently fall for it. In that sense, we get the government we deserve.

But here is the thing, the really silly ploys like 'wars on Christmas', will fall apart completely on their own. Witness Bill O'Reilly who went on the David Letterman show and when cornered by Letterman to produce some evidence of this nonsense trotted out one of three stories he offers. The one related to a school play.

The problem was of course that O'Reilly is completely dishonest. The play was actually a Christmas play, one that goes from church to church in that area. And Letterman, having Millions of times the viewers that O'Reilly has, allows O'Reilly to make his point for him.

For those willing to pay attention this is a daily affair, as these simplistic reactionaries make up the facts as they go. But it's only a matter of time before even the people who tend to fall for these slogans begin to realize they have been duped. And that the O'Reillys, Hannitys, and Limbaughs of the world consistently lie to them on a daily basis.

This shows an unbelievable amount of disdain for the intellect of their own fan base. As for now they simply take it for granted that their "folks" wont ever fact check. But that will change.

Let me state again that I am an absolute optimist. I think that every generation becomes more aware, more rational, and more evolved in terms of consciousness then it's preceding generation.

There are always exceptions of course. And they let us measure the change. But as a general principle I can see that reality tells us this is so. And for proof I would offer history itself.

For example, the idea that owning slaves is ok, or that women should not be allowed to vote, or hold property, the lack of any labor laws, or any child labor laws, segregation as a concept, that mass murder of Native Americans is a good thing. . . .the list goes on and on.

All these things are now considered absurd. But there was also a time when to question any of these things you would have been considered a 'radical'. And you would certainly have been out of the mainstream. Out of step with the public opinion of the time.

The vast majority of the population is completely opposed to all of the above now. Yet at one time in our society, all of the things above where considered the "norm".

Now, anyone advocating these positions would be considered a bigot. And rightfully so.

And just like when members of our generation look back on our great grandfathers generation, and they cannot understand why mixed race couples dating was considered 'immoral' and illegal by the majority at the time. . .there will be a time when our grandkids will look back on our generation with a certain wonderment at how so much of our population could be so backwards, on so many things.

One of the main conservative myths is that are ancestors (even our grandfathers generation) where some how 'more' moral.

This idea is of course completely backwards factually speaking. And yet it is always a side belief of conservatives. A poorly thought out assumption based in ignorance and supported by fear. But one that they absolutely need in order to preserve the terror of the unknown future. . .something that is key to the whole paradigm.

Try reading "Huck's Raft", a historical account of the methods considered 'normal' when educating young kids in the past. To say that they were disgusting would be an understatement. To say they were common place would be factual.

Obviously, many of the people advocating certain conservative positions in our time will eventually be labeled bigots as well. And they will be just as embarrassed regarding their past positions, as Jerry Falwell is regarding his support of segregation.

I think about our imprisonment of Japanese Americans during WW2, and I am reminded of current affairs. I think about civil rights for minorities, and I am reminded of current affairs.

So with all that said I have to explain my reasons for being such an optomist, and they are pretty simple.

People die, I am an optimist because people die.

The bitter old men who argued for slavery didn't change their minds. They eventually all died off. The bigots in the South who argued for segregation didnt wake up one day and realize that we are all equal in Gods eyes. Nope, most of them just died off.

And currently?

Sure we have some lunatic fundamentalists that conclude that two women, or two men, who love each other and wish to have all the rights that come with a full legal commitment, should never be allowed to do so. . .and some how they also feel its their business to tell them no. In their twisted logic, they fear it will affect their own marriage. Bizarre but true.

Besides the obvious stupidity that says someone "chooses" to be gay, or straight, there is the reality that many of these people already raise children. Many of these couples are families, and are raising healthy, happy, beautiful kids. And yet we would deny our brothers and sisters the right to legally make this relationship official?

Why? Because we have taken seriously the ramblings of a few loud mouth simpletons who believe that a rapture is going to come take them out of their SUV's sometime soon, and homosexuality is a choice. After all it must be in order to be a sin to God right?

But here is my reason for optimism again. . . .when polled as to whether gay marriage should remain illegal, 80% of the youths under the age of 25 stated flatly, absolutely no.

So no, the current generation of bigots probably wont come around. A few might, and there is always that hope for the individual. But in large number no, they wont change their opinion.

But, they will all die eventually. And that is how our system betters itself.

When society as a whole is undergoing major changes in perspectives, it will always cause a certain fear based backlash by the cells of the organism which can't adapt.

Sometimes the entire process may take several generations, as the old cells need to die off. But they always do, and change always occurs. And I would offer, always for the better.

Fundamentalism is just a contraction to the past based on fear, ignorance, and self hatred, and it always fails.

The only question is whether or not it will occur in our lifetime, or our grandkid's lifetime.

That is my own optimistic view anyway. And as I stated, its a fairly easy case to make when looking back on history.

If you have read this BLOG before then I can imagine this question:

"How can you judge fundamentalism as obscene, if you also believe everything is in the end ruled by determistic laws. Without any force of free will?"

There are a variety of ways to explain that process, and apparent contradiction in paradigms. We could say big picture, small picture. Or using Buddhist terminology we could say absolute and relative truths. The difference between the two in conversations causes an extreme amount of confusion at times.

As a practical example, I would say that slavery in the USA was by definition, "obscene". At the time however many religious people used scripture as a rationalization for it's existence.

Now that may seem silly to us today, and I would agree that most Christians in the USA would call slavery "obscene" now, in 2006.

However, I would also point out that many, not all, but many "Christians" 200 Years ago would not call slavery obscene. In fact, it may have seemed out of the mainstream to think so.

Segregation is another good example. How many white Southern Christians believed segregation was 'obscene' in the 1920's?

I have no doubt that some did, but was it the majority?

Again, I would bet that the majority, though not all, of Christians in the South would now say that segregation is obscene.

But I also know that as recently as the 1960's it was a huge controversy that Billy Graham did not allow segregation in his services. And as a result, he was often barred from using churches, and found himself having to rent out town halls, and other buildings, for his preaching.

That said, the current generation certainly finds slavery and segregation to be obscene. At least the majority within this Country.

I would call that process of change evolution.

Not evolution of the biological kind, but rather an evolution of thought, of consciousness, of the 'grid', or what we perceive as reality for our world. And I think that in retrospect we came to that position through a process of trail and error.

Through suffering.

And we. . .using "we" in the broadest sense, as in mankind, culture at large, etc, learn from those experiences. . .and that changes our reality.

And that is the answer to the question, as well as a very important point. . . .I am not a believer in "destiny".

There is an assumption that if their is no 'free will' as it is thought of by most people, then everything must therefore be fate. And that is not factual.

One does not automatically imply the other.

You can think it out yourself and realize that for yourself. I will write more on this later.

I was asked in a round about way recently, by a semi sincere questioner, as to whether my business was affected in the middle part of the Country. The unstated implication being that the sharing of views as I try and do, and as I try an encourage, would show a negtaive effect on my job.

All I could really think as he was wandering around that topic was this. . ."Are we really that F^*$ing shallow?"

Cesar Chavez told his early supporters that it would be a hard sacrifice when it comes to starting the union. That some of them would serve as posts, and others as boards, and that together they would form the bridge. Understanding that many others would walk over them to a better place. And he spent 22 hours a day organizing, while living his own life of relative poverty, in order to do just that. Here was a true American hero. A man who sacrificed much. . .

. . . .and we are afraid to stand up to a local Church which wants to ban Catcher in the Rye cause it aint Christian enough? Or we find ourselves worried that by stating the obvious against those that take the positions of bigots, we may turn a few people away?!

Would we let something as minor as that scare us off from standing up for what we believe in?

Do we really still believe that the pursuit of wealth is where its at? Have we never actually read what Jesus Christ had to say on that topic?

Have we figured out yet that being in the 'majority' isnt usually a good thing? And that being 'radical' is rarely a bad thing?

Are we really that fucking shallow?

I think we are much stronger that that.

So the question is, if change occurs, if evolution is a reality. . .does that therefore mean there is a 'designer' a planner, or even an 'individual' who is "free" (also, does one 'automatically' imply the other? You can use reasoning and conclude it does not) to make that change.

And I think that question has already been answered. . . . .and I also think it will take us several generations for the implications of that answer to really sink in, and filter through our cultures. And I think that will be a good thing when it does.

And by good thing, I use 'good' not in a "moralistic" sense of the word, but good in a practical sense. . .ie: less suffering, more happiness and Love.

On pretending to know what God does or does not do on tending his garden...

"God is the Garden"
- Albert Einstein

*** *** ***

Superstition, sustention, & sanity. .

2006-01-31T16:17:00.000-08:00

I am headed to Ireland tomorrow.

I have a lot of things I want to write about regarding the "either - or - us - them" weirdness that seems to be invading the American consciousness. I'll hit all that when I get home.

In the meantime I wanted to share this piece written by Thomas W. Clark. I think it points to a really important debate that is the hidden force behind the so called "culture war" that is raging in the USA at the moment.

The age old battle between superstition and science, progress and stagnation, patterns and freedom, left and right, all comes down to a single point of contention. . .the irrational belief in a certain kind of individual 'free will'. And understanding the distinction between these two models is, in my own opinion, the most important social issue all of us will deal with in these next few generations.

Underneath arguments about crime and punishment, overseas policy, warfare, education, poverty, and "values", underneath all of it, exists this one simple distinction in understanding. And I believe firmly that it will, in the end, be the decisive shift in thinking that will move us all, entire societies, forward to a more enlightened, loving, and happy place.

Here is the passage from Thomas Clarke's article:

"In his book The Moral Animal. Wright predicts that the increasing success of scientific explanation will compel us to admit that "we are all machines, pushed and pulled by forces that we can't discern but that science can." But, he argues, it is through understanding these forces, not denying them, that we might become truly moral animals and responsible citizens.

Virtue, like crime, has its roots not in a mysterious freedom of choice, but in concrete social circumstances which we can learn to control. While making his case, Wright points out that Charles Darwin never bought the free will myth either, although he kept quiet about it.

Not surprisingly, however, Wilson and Wrights prescription to abandon free will is a very tough sell, since most of us resent the seemingly drastic drop in status implied by full-bore determinism. Few of us want to concede our souls to mechanism.

For example, consider that commentaries on the new genetics often include reassuring references to a human exemption from causality. On these accounts, the environment, or character, or perhaps some non-physical personal essence, gives us a special freedom. Determinism is restricted to what is clearly biological, leaving wiggle room for the self-made self.

Cases in point: At a conference on genes and society in Cambridge last year, a speaker worried that we are succumbing to genetic determinism, the idea that DNA shapes nearly everything about a person. But such determinism is false, he argued, since the environment too contributes heavily to behavior and personality. The soothing implication was that environmental influences are somehow less constraining than genetics.*

*(Ask yourself does the idea that 'environmental influences are somehow less constraining than genetics' make sense?)

Similarly, in a Time magazine profile of DNA researcher Dean Hamer, J. Madeleine Nash wrote that "What people are born with, says Hamer, are temperamental traits. What they can acquire through experience is the ability to control these traits by exercising that intangible part of personality called character." Here again, experience (read environment) and character come to the rescue, overriding the mechanistic clockwork of our genes.

However, its been clear for some time that environmental influences are no less determining than genetics, and that character is set by circumstances as much as biology. As B. F. Skinners work in behaviorism showed, the molding effect of the environment is powerful and often predictable, and recent research on the neural "reward pathway" in the brain has laid the groundwork for understanding precisely how the self is shaped by experience.

Science holds that we are, in toto, the products of a prodigiously complex dance between nature and nurture, which means that it banishes the self-originating self just as surely as ghosts and goblins.

But even scientists who realize that the environment offers no refuge from determinism will sometimes flinch, and offer the traditional reassurance that we might be miniature first causes.

Speaking at another conference on genetics, Francis Collins, director of the National Center for Genome Research at the National Institutes of Health, said "Even when we completely understand all of the genes, what happens to us will be a result of interactions of genes, environment, and free will, which wont go away as a consequence of understanding our biology" (emphasis added).

Some hope to find free will lurking in the indeterminacy of quantum physics, or in the unpredictability of chaotic systems, but it seems strange to suppose that people should be held responsible for what befalls them haphazardly.

Others will insist that, like God, we have powers of self-creation that transcend science and the natural world. But as British philosopher Galen Strawson reminds us in a recent Times Literary Supplement piece on free will, no finite creature whether material or ethereal can literally bootstrap itself into existence.

Even though determinism presently disturbs us, as science progresses we might eventually get used to the idea of being very complex, but non-mysterious organic mechanisms, or "meat machines," as artificial intelligence guru Marvin Minsky, Stephen Pinkers colleague at M.I.T., so unpoetically puts it.

Well see, following Wilson and Wright, that we are still gripped by morality and that the law doesnt lose its teeth. Nor, just because we admit that we havent built our motives and character from the ground up, will we become any less unique, or creative, or committed in what we do. Cravings, ambitions, and altruistic concerns will still have their way with us.

However, we might become a little less egocentric in taking credit for our accomplishments, and a little more wary of piling on blame for "failures of will."

By dropping the idea that people essentially create themselves, well likely pay more attention to fostering the social and economic conditions which bring out the best in us.

And to the extent that the notion of uncaused free will fuels the desire for retribution, support for the death penalty and other needlessly harsh punishments should diminish.

Of course there is no telling exactly how things might change, were we to accept the fact that its not just genes that determine us, but our surroundings as well.

But if we find ourselves regretting the loss of what now seems an illusory freedom, we are more than compensated by knowing that to have what we want . . . even poetry . . . we need not be more than we actually are."

- Thomas W. Clark

Questioner: One seer speaks in the terms of Christianity, another in those of Islam, a third of Buddhism, etc. Is that due to their upbringing?

Ramana: Whatever may be their upbringing, their experience is the same. But the modes of expression differ according to the circumstances.

Questioner: Last night you said God is guiding us. Then why should we make an effort to do anything?

Ramana: Who asks you to do so?

+++ +++ +++

Darwin, Purpose, & Electric Gold. . .

2005-12-16T01:37:00.000-08:00

A friend recently said to me that the only good reason to ever write, is because you have to.

I have not had to write in awhile. So other then a few notes, quotes, and memos, I have not sat down to put much out. A lot has happened within the last several Months. And those experiences have floated about in memory for a bit, until I realized I had to write. So here it is, and on a positive note, I also view it as a kind of safety mechanism. It helps ensure a sense of authenticity. I am not a good enough writer to ever fake that.

To begin with I had the chance a few weeks ago to attend a live video conference with the movie Director David Lynch. What interested me was not just the fact that it was David Lynch, who is brilliant, but also the title of the video conference. . . .consciousness and unity as related to the creative process.

Talk about a title.

He began by talking about recent revelations that have occurred to him, and how this relates to the unicity of mind, universe, and self. But I was hooked at unicity. He spent a lot of time talking about meditation, and tapping into that dynamic source of mind for creative breakthroughs in Art, and meaning. He talked about the importance of Authenticity, and he had an obvious faith based on past observation, that if you truly were following your bliss, then all else would follow. He expressed that the variety of Artistic mediums he used was directly related to the need he has to stay creative. And I am really sure he expressed all of it much better then I am writing above. I didn’t take notes, and I didn’t try and memorize his exact use of metaphor. But he used a lot.

He then fielded a whole lot of questions. A lot of these were related to movie making, which was interesting to me in the sense of anyone who is great at their craft being interesting when they share the discoveries that have come as a result of that. And he also answered a few about movie stars I can’t remember.

But two questions in particular really captured my attention.

The first was a question asked by a clearly uber cool, way too hip, angst ridden, I am a dangerous artist type. He questioned Lynch on the ‘edge’ that might be lost when an artist takes on that optimistic, evolution of consciousness, there is only one, type of realization. How that may lead to a more soft and fluffy type of message. . .to the loss of that crucial hint of darkness, the loss of that artistic edge.

Lynch, without pausing even a breath for thought, ripped open the questioner immediately by saying. . . .yes, I used to be that person myself. I used to think that playing that dark, moody, artist role would get me laid more. And it did. And I identified with that, and so I thought I needed it for that quality. But then I realized that was just an act. It was bullshit. And it left me. . . . . . . . . the questioner sat down.

The second question was about the process of revelation. The movement of real transformation, which seems to also at times lend itself to severe emotional lows. The highs of authentic introspective realizations can often mark just how low the daily operating level of consciousness we each display can be. Which when measured against such an extreme high, or chased after, becomes a low which can feel seriously debilitating at times. It was a process that every authentic artist, craftsman, thinker, lover, or joker, knows all too well.

Everyone nodded at the problem presented.

So when dipping as far into that dynamic well as you are proposing Mr Lynch, how can we prevent those lows?

Again, without any pause, Lynch started asking the questioner to close his eyes and visualize something in the mind. He said:

“Imagine that mind is like the empire state building. And it has thousands and thousands of rooms. And many of those rooms remained unused, are dark, dusty, and have not been opened in years.

And then imagine that the Empire State building produced this amazing energy. And this energy was beautiful, like ‘electric gold’. . . .but sometimes this energy gets stuck, sometimes it doesn’t come out of the building as it should. So you have to get inside the building and clean it out.

So you have hundreds of these robots. And these automatic robots go through the building, room by room. They enter all the old rooms which had not been cleaned in decades. And they clean each room. . .step by step, through the entire building”

Now the small crowd at the video conference is looking around nervously? What is he saying?

And then he said. . .”And you have to imagine that those robots tend to kick up a lot of old dust, a lot of old stuff, and its going to float in the air for a bit, and make things murky. . . .he paused. . . . .But the thing is, the electric gold just keeps flowing through.

I might have just massacred David Lynch’s metaphor here. But trust me, I had an honest moment of. . .”Oh”. He is a great speaker, and you can’t possibly plan what he brings in the moment.

Man is the only animal that blushes, or needs to.
-Mark Twain

I watched an interview with two of Americans top scientists in the fields of biology, and evolution. James Watson, and E.O.Wilson talked about Darwin, evolution, and DNA. It was one of the most fascinating interviews I have seen in a long time.

What struck me were their answers to questions related to modern day evolution. Does what we know of evolution, DNA, and conditioning leave room for “evil”, for that sort of ‘choice’?

No, and the realization of that can lead to a different take on crime and punishment, and civilizations as a whole.

Does mankind still evolve?. . .absolutely.

Then the natural question. . . . . is man evolving for the ‘better’?

And the answer was that the preponderance of evidence suggests that we are evolving to be nicer human beings.

When asked how that relates to the incredible extremes of violence we now seem to have, Wilson’s answer was. . .”Just imagine what it was like 20,000 Years ago.”

He had a point.

“It is remarkable how much trust we have in each other as human beings now. All things considered.”

I want to sit in a room with those guys and ask them a hundred questions.

I’ll share the one minor point I had with how they presented their ideas. They rejected flat out the process of revelation, as a tool. That would be fine, except they then went on to articulate the fact that Darwin was perhaps the most important man who ever lived. Also ok. But this belief was based on the fact that for whatever reason, Darwin was able to, by simply looking around at his surroundings and thinking, realize to a large degree where we all came from.

It was similar to how I have heard Scientists, who are really familiar with the history and theories of Albert Einstein, describe the process he used when realizing his world changing revelations. A paradigm shift so vast, that only an incredibly creative, intuitive pull of energy, can bring it into focus.

It is the kind of thing that comes through to us. . . . .if I wanted to go out on a limb I could even describe it as God reaching out and making contact with itself.

So at that level of realization, what similarities would a Darwin or Einstein share with say a Shakespeare, or Mozart? Speaking only for my own idea on the subject, I think that thing they share sometimes gets undervalued by experts that come from fields that measure nature. And I think that is probably just fine.

I think that is what poetry is for.

It is you who will define which I you think of, when you say I.
-Ram Dass

A Bodhisattva set off on a journey to meet the Buddha. As he walked he ran into a man on the road sitting in the lotus posture meditating. Only this man had not bothered to find a shady spot in the road, so his skin had become rough. When the Bodhisattva asked the man what he was hoping to achieve, the man said he believed absolutely in the force of will. That if he just had the strength, the power, the discipline, then he would be able to achieve freedom. And then he said. . . . . “when you see the Buddha ask him long it will be until I become enlightened”. . . and the Bodhisattva agreed.

A few days later the Bodhisattva came to a different man who was camped by the side of the road. This man was dancing, laughing, and singing. There were children playing about, and women dancing and laughing, food, and wine, and a festive, joyful mood. And then the man stopped dancing for a brief moment, and he asked the Bodhisattva . . . .”when you see the Buddha ask him how long it will be until I become enlightened.”. . . .and the Bodhisattva agreed.

He then went on and had his meeting with the Buddha.

On the way back he ran across the man he had met first on his journey . . . .by this time the man was almost dead. He had worked himself ceaselessly during the day, and had maintained an austere meditation practice in the evening. . . almost dead, absolutely miserable, the man asked the Bodhisattva. . . .”when did the Buddha say I would attain enlightenment?!”. . . .”The Buddha said, 6 more lifetimes". . . . . .”oh that’s horrible, I can’t stand it!”, yelled the man. And he began weeping.

A few days later the Bodhisattva ran into the second man he had seen on the road. When the man saw the Bodhisattva approaching, he stopped dancing and ran over to greet him. . . . .”when did the Buddha say I would attain enlightenment?!”. . . . . . “You see that large tree over there, the one with all those leaves? The Buddha said that every leaf on that tree represents a hundred more lifetimes”. . . . . . . . . .. . . .”Is that all?!” said the man, and he began dancing and singing, even more joyfully, exuberantly then he had before.

And at that moment he became free.

”I'm curious to know where J.Krishnamurti states there's free will.”

"From a scientific point of view, the question either is not raised, because free will appears only as a subjective feeling and never as a verifiable fact; or should be answered in favour of determinism, because there is no verifiable evidence that any personal decision is not a reaction to prevailing circumstances, an automatic response to biochemical reactions in the brain.

For all materialists, who consider the mind to be a function of the brain, there can be no free will. Only if the minds or the souls are independent entities is it possible to assert their freedom, whereas if they are mere processes or functions of the body no such freedom is possible.

The decisive question, thus, is whether the soul is a separate, independent entity. For a dualist philosopher, it is. But then he has to face the problem of how to explain the interaction between body and soul: if the soul is a separate substance, an entity which does not depend on the body, then how is one to account for the remarkable effects of physical conditions on the soul's reactions, or inversely how is one to explain the supposed control of the soul over the body?

For a nondualist, who sustains that everything appears in Consciousness, and that there is only that One Consciousness, there is no such thing as free will, because all individual body-minds are not real entities, but mere appearances without substance. Where there is no real doer, there cannot be a free will.

What regards Consciousness Itself, being the only and ultimate subject, It is not an object. It is thus free of attributes or qualities. It is free of action, free of decisions, free of choices, free of will. It is pure Freedom."

Miguel-Angel Carrasco

I think the problem that some very rational people have with the idea that we as human beings are evolving, and that this evolution is for the better, is that it seems to posit a kind of “purpose”. And that raises a lot of flags for a lot of really bright people.

But my take on it is this, the above stated distaste for the concept is based entirely on a simple confusion between consciousness, and time.

All biological and organic things have a sense of time. That is, they are temporary. They are governed by a set of guidelines we call chemistry and physics, and like all things that can be measured, are transitory. And I think that is an important thing to remember, especially when it comes to happiness.

Evolution, or the reality of it, is a fact. In the sense that the Sun, or stars are a fact. The idea that humans are evolving to become "nicer" is simply the preponderance of evidence, as agreed upon by people who have the greatest expertise in their specific fields of measurement.

The idea that this is a "purpose" is a linkage we make in our own minds, but not actuality itself. They can be independent, that is things can be evolving for the better, while at the same time lacking a purpose. It is only desire that creates a purpose. That does not mean that 'purpose' is an actual thing. Purpose is subjective, except as related to measurable phenomena.

But even here a better term might be likelihood. . . .it is likely, that when throwing a ball into the air, it will fall back down. We call that gravity. This does not therefore mean that gravity is the purpose of that phenomena.

They have asked people who were in the last stages of a terminal illness, what things do they most regret, or wished they had done in their lifetime.

Nobody said they wished they had made more money, or worked harder.

The two most common answers were these. . . I wish I had spent more time with those I love.

And I wish I had traveled more, and related more to this planet, this home we share.

“If at first an idea is not absurd, there is no hope for it.”
-Einstein

***

8 December 1980. . . .

2005-12-08T01:31:00.000-08:00

"I believe in God, but not as one thing, not as an old man in the sky. I believe that what people call God is something in all of us. I believe that what Jesus and Mohammed and Buddha and all the rest said was right. It's just that the translations have gone wrong." - John Lennon

"I'm not going to change the way I look or the way I feel to conform to anything. I've always been a freak. So I've been a freak all my life and I have to live with that, you know. I'm one of those people."
- John Lennon

"You don't need anybody to tell you who you are or what you are.

You are what you are!" - John Lennon

"You're just left with yourself all the time, whatever you do anyway. You've got to get down to your own God in your own temple. It's all down to you, mate." - John Lennon

9 October 1940 – 8 December 1980

“The nature of the Universe loves nothing so much as to change things which are and to make new things like them. For everything that exists is in a manner the seed of that which will be.”
- Marcus Aurelius

+

Imagine. . .

2005-12-05T00:22:00.000-08:00

Lennon of course. . . . . .but I realized that a lot of us still have this dream.

And although a lot of people may call it naive, it may be only if I demanded to see it in my liftetime.

But I think I have reconciled with the reality that it will most likely take many-many generations for this revolution of evolution, this change in consciousness, to take place.

And I think the genuine feeling within oneself that the whole process, the passing of the generations, and the long evolution of time itself, is truly ok, or better stated, incredibly miraculous. . .is a cool thing.

And without a doubt, something worth waiting for.

I don't have much else to say at the moment. Except that maybe everything else I have written here has been true. But only as seen from a point in time. Just like everything else, including our own being. And it's all ok to say, and think through. And that life does not have to be a constant struggle.

Love is joy.

'If I was in your position, I'd put down all my ammunition

I'd wonder why it had taken me so long.

But lord know I is not you
And if I was I wouldn't be so cruel
Cause waiting on Love ain't so easy to do.'

-Jack Johnson

Death never hails
Recycled cans
Get well cards to the hostage vans.

- Beck

Those lyrics have been in my head lately, now they are in yours.

"Question Authority, and think for Yourself."
- Timothy Leary

*